In 2007, University of North Carolina basketball standout Tyler Hansbrough shared with Sports Illustrated how he is availing himself of UNC’s academic opportunities:

There’s no reason I chose Swahili other than that I thought it would be cool. I enjoy it.

Now we learn that “Swahili” is UNC-speak for “a non-existent class.”

Other professors linked to the Swahili class and eight others have disowned them, and the investigation has found their signatures were forged on course paperwork.

In fact, athlete-heavy summer classes like “SWAH 403: Intermediate Swahili” never met. Other suspect classes had only a single student–a basketball player–officially enrolled.

How does UNC basketball coach Roy Williams respond to the discovery? Will he call for an investigation? Demand higher academic standards? Offer platitudinous rationalizations?

It is not a basketball issue. It’s a university issue.

The players were eligible to be enrolled in those classes, as were non-student-athletes, and they did the work that was assigned to them.

How do you say “college credit for jump shot” in Swahili?

Rutgers won its first ever bowl game!

Not that football success is new to Rutgers. After all, Rutgers topped Princeton six to four in the first ever collegiate football game.

Yes, Rutgers.

Tony Soprano

You got a problem wittat?